It was then that he realized he was unbreakable

Published on October 28, 2021

Ryan grew up in the foster system.  There were pleasant and not so friendly foster homes.  He was in and out of the juvenile hall for crimes he committed to make ends meet.  Ryan’s basketball coach, Derek, understood Ryan’s situation, and he wanted him to turn Ryan’s life around.  He could see his potential. So Derek began mentoring Ryan to improve his grades and stay out of trouble.  Ryan was able to maintain his grades, but he had a hard time staying off the streets.  He didn’t feel like he had a lot of options; he had to survive.

By the time Ryan was twenty years old, a friend had been shot and killed, three friends had died of drug overdoses, and two were in prison.  He didn’t want to go down the same path. Instead, Ryan found full-time work and went to school part-time.  He fell in love and quickly married and had a child.  The financial stress was overwhelming.  But Ryan refused to go back to the street.  He looked back at all the trauma and abuse that he had been through and realized he was resilient.  He made it out; he survived.  He learned so much about people and the business of crime that he felt he could be a legitimate entrepreneur.

It was then; he realized he was unbreakable.  He had been through more than the average person, but he was still standing.  He had seen and learned things on the streets that most people won’t learn in a lifetime. Ryan was unbreakable, but he was anxious.  The thought of networking with people to start his business was intimidating.

Ryan consulted a professional who helped him to overcome his anxiety.  Ryan had developed deep trust issues, and it was standing in the way of him forming professional relationships.  With help, Ryan was able to thrive and reach his potential.


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Category(s):Adjusting to Change / Life Transitions, Attachment Issues, Complex PTSD, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) / Trauma / Complex PTSD

Written by:

Dr Monica Borschel

Welcome! My passion is to help you find inner peace and emotional comfort within yourself and your relationships.

As social creatures, our relationships significantly shape our happiness, well-being, and sense of self-worth. Unfortunately, many of us have experienced relationship-related traumas, which can leave us with emotional scars that require recovery.

Attachment traumas, such as divorce, break-ups, infidelity, neglect, and abuse, can be challenging. As an expert in attachment, loss, and trauma, I have spent many years studying how attachment styles can shift with loss and trauma.

I have seen how healthy relationships can lead to secure attachment and how insecure attachment can create turmoil in our lives. I aim to guide you toward cultivating healthy relationships with yourself, your children, your co-parent, and your romantic partner.

I can help you develop new attachment strategies that will allow you to form deeper connections and bonds with those around you. And, if you have children, I can also assist you in establishing secure attachments with both parents, which can be especially helpful in cases of separation or divorce.

I am originally from Salt Lake City, Utah, where I completed my Bachelor of Science in Psychology at The University of Utah. From there, I moved to New York City, earning my Master’s in Clinical Psychology from Columbia University. I then pursued my Doctorate in Social Work and Social Administration at the University of Hong Kong. I lived and worked in Hong Kong as a practicing Clinical Psychologist from 2010-2020. I reside in California and am pursuing my Doctorate in Psychology (PsyD) at California Southern University. My training and qualifications include certifications in Brainspotting and High Conflict Coaching.

These tools, combined with my extensive knowledge and experience in the field, enable me to offer you the guidance and support you need to recover from past traumas and build healthy relationships.

My approach to therapy is empathetic, supportive, and tailored to your unique needs. Every person can grow, and thrive. I am committed to helping you achieve your goals. So, whether you are struggling with relationship issues, divorce, abuse, attachment traumas, or other challenges, I am here to help you find the peace and comfort you deserve.

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