Why Being Selfish Hurts You

Published on July 22, 2021

Being selfish hurts you. It is dangerous. 

Not just psychologically and spiritually but also relationally. It creates bad effects on one’s overall well being.
Selfishness or self-centeredness is natural in a child. But in an adult, it is childish and immature.
That’s where the hurt is. A hurt that can last a lifetime.
My client, Rizza, was excessively bitter and unforgiving of her husband’s accidental infidelity.
Despite obvious evidences of her husband’s sincerity and remorse, she “attacks” him verbally and physically.
She also had become unduly critical and intolerant of others as she harbored bitterness towards her husband. 
Rizza evolved though after a few sessions. She developed patience and calmness. 
And she realized that her past excessive behavior had roots somewhere in her selfishness or self-centeredness.
Writer Charles Durham gives a shrewd analysis of some hurt by selfishness.
He writes, “The reformers were often power-hungry, the excessive talker needs to be at the center stage, the competitor must be the best, and the angry person must have a vendetta. Boasting is often the expression of excessive pride, or a cover for personal insecurity.”
You see, when you’re selfish, your risk or potential for mental health disorders is increased. 
Deeper depression or loneliness is one of these. You discourage others too to get close to you.
To remedy this unhappy fruit of selfishness, you should understand the need for healing and therapy. 
That calls for a ruthlessly honest reevaluation of your attitudes, painful though the process may be. 
It will be worth the pain ... and the wait. To be healthy, alive, and whole.


Category(s):Anger Management, Borderline Personality Disorder, Self-Care / Self Compassion

Written by:

Dr. Angelo Subida, Psychotherapist

Dr. Angelo Subida is a clinical psychotherapist, author, and speaker. He is author of books "Inner Healing," "Secrets Of Your Self," "Chess and Life," among others, blogs, and articles. He has appeared frequently as an expert on psychotherapy/life recovery issues on national television, radio broadcasts, print media, and webcasts, including GMA 7, TV 5, ABS CBN 2, Q-11, 700 Club, Radyo Veritas, Inquirer Radio, Smart Parenting Magazine, Business Mirror, among others, and has served as resident therapist/counselor for parents and kid-artists in the highly popular ABS-CBN 2 Voice Kids TV singing reality show. Dr. Subida is an eclectic, multidisciplinary therapist and originator of his own revolutionary high-tech, high-touch counseling plus model. His areas of specialization include parent-child therapy, clinical infidelity treatment, relationship/marital counseling, separation/divorce therapy, anger management, depression, addictions, psychotherapy-spirituality integration, and innovative chess therapy. For more of Dr. Subida, you can find him at www.drsubida.com.

Dr. Angelo Subida, Psychotherapist belongs to Dr. Angelo O. Subida Psychotherapy Clinic in Philippines

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