Diplomacy – heart of a lost art.

Published on April 25, 2020

In a society where meeting genuine people is getting rarer by the day, the question emerges – Where is the line between diplomacy and hypocrisy?
We do want people who are polite, well mannered, gentle, kind, assertive, loyal, focussed and honest. A list of wishful qualities? Not really. There are so many virtuous people around us, and then, there are so many more wannabes, who want to believe themselves to be so, but end up being just pretenders.

The Cambridge dictionary defines a diplomat as “a person who is skilled at dealing with difficult situations in a way that does not offend people”. Isn’t this world in an urgent need of diplomats? Families, societies, countries all would do well to breed a line of these. They could resolve more problems than all the politicians, administrators, family elders put together.

Diplomacy isn’t a new art; probably just a lost one. There was a time when diplomatic qualities were nurtured and groomed in individuals to make them capable and effective family members and society leaders… a village head, the eldest son or daughter, a potential leader, etc.

What is it that helps distinguish between a diplomatic person and a hypocritical one? Let me try to put down some thoughts..

1. Does the person practise what he/she preaches?

2. Does the person sound honest enough, yet respectful?

3. Does the person have a personal motive behind his /her opinion or conduct?

4. Will the person say or do the same thing if your positions in life were switched?

5. Is the person consistent in his/her opinions over time and situations?

In order to sift the diplomats from the hypocrites, an important prerequisite is also the embedding, culturing and nurturing of a sound value system in us. If our values falter, then it becomes impossible to distinguish the right from the wrong, truth from fiction, friendly banter from gossip, healthy discussion from cheeky manouvering.

Diplomats, may your tribe increase. Pecksniffs, stand aside please.


Category(s):Empathy, Ending a relationship issues, Personality problems, Strengths Assessment

Written by:

Mini Nair

Mini Nair completed Masters in Clinical Psychology and is a certified Cognitive Behaviour Therapist. Also qualified in Human Resources Management, she has been associated with the psycho-socio-educational-familial aspects of the lives of children and adults for over 19 years now.
Her work includes student and parent counseling, medical psychotherapeutics, psychodiagnostics, teaching undergraduate students of psychology, conducting Behaviour Management workshops for students, parents and teachers. She has already worked with some leading educational institutions and hospitals in Mumbai and other metros in India. Her interest in spreading awareness about personality development and growth has led her to contribute articles to the Times Wellness supplements. She currently works as an Independent Consultant.
A multi-faceted personality with formal training in classical dance too, she blogs to convey thoughts that can't stay inside her head anymore!


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