Making the right choices

Published on January 8, 2016

Life is stressful in modern times. Each one of us are multitasking to fit in the numerous demands of life daily. Often amidst the craziness of daily demands, life seems to spiral out control. We feel stressed, helpless, often wondering how we ended up where we are now.

The good news is instead of feeling helpless we can actually take charge of our lives and strive towards solutions to our problems. We must remember, that while we argue about whether the glass is half empty or half full, we always have the choice to fill up the glass or drain all the water out.

The key to reality therapy is understanding that you cannot control everything, but you can control your own behaviour, thereby, bringing positive change in to your life. Here are few simple steps to make life easier:

a) How you perceive things can make a world of difference. For example, one heated argument with co-worker can be attributed as the co-worker's fault or it can be attributed to an unfortunate misunderstanding. Clearly and objectively viewing things can often help to bring a positive outlook on life.

b) If there is a problem, instead of getting frustrated think how you can solve it. For example, if you want more time from your spouse, schedule a day, plan a date, and inform your spouse of your decision. Express yourself.

c) Always remember that what might be an ideal solution or ideal picture in your mind, might not be the ideal solution for someone else. For example, we often walk in to marriage, job, or other big life decisions having an ideal image of what it looks like and then get frustrated and angry when they clash with reality.

d) Be flexible to work with others to create a solution that is closer to ideal solution for all involved. For example, if you want time from your spouse two days a week and your spouse can manage only one, then be flexible to start with that.

Finally always remember that you have the power. You can chose to cultivate habits that can help you lead a healthy life. You can chose to create a work schedule that can help manage your stress. Most, importantly when you are feeling overwhelmed, don't stay silent, seek help. Seek help from your support system, and if needed seek professional help. Seeking help is also a choice that only you can make to improve your quality of life.



Glasser, W. (2011). Take charge of your life: How to get what you need with choice theory psychology.  Bloomington, USA: iUniverse inc.


Category(s):Career Development and Change, Happiness, Stress Management, Workplace Issues

Written by:

Piyali Chakrabarti

Mrs. Chakrabarti is a Singapore Registered Psychologist (SRP) and an Approved Supervisor recognized by the Singapore Psychological Society. She completed her M.Phil from the renowned Central Institute of Psychiatry (CIP) in India after completing her Masters in Applied Psychology from the University of Calcutta. Besides being a Psychologist at Scott Psychological Centre, Piyali continues to offer her services part-time at the Cerebral Palsy Alliance of Singapore where she had previously served as Head of the Department of Psychology.

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