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It took a while. But Helen was finally able to let go of her sexually addicted, unfaithful, and abusive boyfriend. To help Helen with her growing depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts, I got her in touch with reality and to see what really is. She finally realized that she was victimized by a con man and predator who successfully preyed on her, and successfully victimizing a lot of other women.
Our world is full of "jerks" and you can be victimized by one or more. In its simplest form, being a jerk means "being selfish" or "anyone who selfishly uses or abuses any human being that is ultimately harmful to the other." The root of selfishness in a jerk is a sense of "entitlement" that simply shouts, "I deserve to get, be, and act the way I do."
In the psychiatric manual DSM IV/V, "narcissistic personality disorder" (NPD) is one of the recognized mental disorders. Narcissistic personality disorder is another definition of a jerk. Of course, it comes from the root word "Narcissus" in Greek mythology. The character, Narcissus, sat gazing at his reflection in a pool for so long that he fell in love with himself and became so enthralled with his appearance that he turned into a flower that bears his name. Simply put, narcissism is self-centeredness.
In my practice and in the lives of countless people, I've observed too many lives damaged by jerks or narcissistic personalities. The pendulum has swung too far, creating enormous grief and suffering in the lives of victims. I've known increases in abuse, in compulsions, in addictions of all kinds, and in existential despair over the fallout and abandonment committed by jerks.
You can overcome the abuse and damage of a jerk in your life. You begin by walking away and getting your healing ....
Dr. Angelo Subida is a clinical psychotherapist, author, and speaker. He is author of books "Inner Healing," "Secrets Of Your Self," "Chess and Life," among others, blogs, and articles. He has appeared frequently as an expert on psychotherapy/life recovery issues on national television, radio broadcasts, print media, and webcasts, including GMA 7, TV 5, ABS CBN 2, Q-11, 700 Club, Radyo Veritas, Inquirer Radio, Smart Parenting Magazine, Business Mirror, among others, and has served as resident therapist/counselor for parents and kid-artists in the highly popular ABS-CBN 2 Voice Kids TV singing reality show. Dr. Subida is an eclectic, multidisciplinary therapist and originator of his own revolutionary high-tech, high-touch counseling plus model. His areas of specialization include parent-child therapy, clinical infidelity treatment, relationship/marital counseling, separation/divorce therapy, anger management, depression, addictions, psychotherapy-spirituality integration, and innovative chess therapy. For more of Dr. Subida, you can find him at www.drsubida.com.