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Emotional Affairs are an issue that we see more and more. What is an emotional affair? It can be described as intense romantic feelings directed toward a person outside your primary relationship. In other words, having an emotional affair is falling in love with the potential or fantasy you have created about another person.
Spouses engaged in these relationships are often reticent to stop them because they swear that 'they are just friends' and it is not an affair. While most people know intellectually that marriages take time and work, emotionally they are distracted by 'life' and their marraige as a priority falls behind and takes second place (or worse) on the priority list. Before you know it years can pass and spouses can feel estranged and lonely and begin to questions their compatibility and happiness together. At any point during the process of 'growing apart' a spouse is vulnerable to an emotional (or sexual) affair.
Signs of possible emotional affair:
- thinking about the person a lot
- fantaszing about what it would be like to be with them
- keeping secrets from your spouse
- sexually fantaszing about them
- having a sense of grief or loss when you think you might never be with them
- mentally comparing the fantasy with your current partner, you feel like your current partner falls short
The good news is that if you suspect an emotional affair is happening you should take it as a sign to work on your marriage.
Please feel free to contact us for more information at artsinpsychotherapy@live.co.uk
