Understanding Trauma

Trauma occurs when an accident, abuse, loss or something unpredictable causes us to feel emotions such as intense fear, shock, denial and distress. For the most part, people might have trauma reactions such as nightmares, hypervigilance or physical symptoms after a tragic or dangerous event that heals by itself after a short period. However, ...

Jun 21

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Adult psychological development, ...

Written By:
Dr Monica Borschel

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Identifying Toxic People

Identifying toxic relationships and abuseToxic relationships often harm our self-esteem and leave us feeling drained of energy. When we learn how to recognize toxic relationships and abuse we can move away from them. If we have a history of being abused, we may not recognise that we are caught in a cycle of abuse. After reading this article, ...

Jun 21

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Adjusting to Change / Life ...

Written By:
Dr Monica Borschel

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Why Am I So Angry?

Humans have emotions for a reason.  Some emotions keep us safe, social and on a certain life path.  Anger is an emotion that tells others, "don't mess with me," or "I want to feel in control." Anger helps us to feel powerful and it can motivate us.  Anger is not a problem, but how we react to it can be.1. ...

Jun 21

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Anger Management, Control Issues, ...

Written By:
Dr Monica Borschel

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Finding your confidence after abuse

If you have been abused as a child or as an adult, you might feel worthless.  If as a child you underwent neglect, rejection or abuse from your parents, confidence might be harder to find.  A child who has experienced verbal abuse and neglect will begin to believe that they are worthless and horrible.  The damage from abuse might ...

Jun 21

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Aggression & Violence, Mental ...

Written By:
Dr Monica Borschel

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The Little Details Of Parenting

Parenting is both a rewarding and challenging task.  There is no such thing as a perfect parent; just a well informed good enough parent.  Certain parenting behaviours that have been passed down from generation to generation have dire consequences.  The current generation has pressure from all directions, academically and ...

Jun 21

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Child and/or Adolescent Issues, Child ...

Written By:
Dr Monica Borschel

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Increasing Self-Confidence

Standing in the train or lift can be a scrutinising experience in Hong Kong, as well as other international cities. We all like to look at our peers to socially compare ourselves to them, and them to us. This increases or decreases our false sense of self.  The false sense of self is the self that is attached to external validation, meaning ...

Jun 21

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Adjusting to Change / Life ...

Written By:
Dr Monica Borschel

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Living Your Life Again

We live in a fast-paced age. The world is a smaller place because of technology, internet, and airplanes through our skies.This advancement has lots of pluses. The speed, the technology, helps. Speaking for myself, I can conduct sessions anywhere I am to attend to those from varied places or ...

Mar 26

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Adjusting to Change / Life ...

Written By:
Dr. Angelo Subida, Psychotherapist

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Crying Without Shame

Dina seemed incapable of receiving compliments. In our “chit chat” during session, after I’d affirmed her accomplishments and good looks, she started avoiding eye contact by staring at the floor or holding her self tightly.

Feb 17

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Depression, Emotional Abuse

Written By:
Dr. Angelo Subida, Psychotherapist

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How to Handle Emotional Abuse in Relationship and Marriage?

Emotional abuse is one form of abuse which people can experience in a relationship. Though emotional abuse doesn’t leave physical scars, it generally has a huge impact on victim’s confidence, self-esteem and can lead them to depression and suicide. However, if you are being ...

Jul 7

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Relationships & Marriage

Written By:
Counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo

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How Can I Be Responsible When I'm One Abused?

You may ask, “How can I be responsible when I’m the one abused, hurt, or ‘sinned against’?”

Dec 3

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Adjusting to Change / Life ...

Written By:
Dr. Angelo Subida, Psychotherapist

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The Therapy of Kindness

I’m reminded of Aldous Huxley, a noted writer-philosopher. He was dying. At his deathbed, he was asked what words and wisdom he would like to tell and leave to the world. He replied, “I wish people would be kinder to each other.”What does “kindness” mean? Here’s ...

Sep 27

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Addictions, Marital Counseling

Written By:
Dr. Angelo Subida, Psychotherapist

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Can I Be Cured?

"There is no incurable illness, only incurable people.” That’s Dr. Bernie Siegel in his book “Love, Medicine, & Miracles,” with a subtitle “lessons learned about self-healing from a surgeon’s experience with exceptional patients.”That statement ...

Jun 1

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Addictions, Relationships & ...

Written By:
Dr. Angelo Subida, Psychotherapist

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The Compulsion To Repeat

As I write this, I'm in a fitness first gym taking drinks in the lounge area. The place is so pleasant with lots of wonderful facilities and staff. Yet when I'm on the treadmill or walking around thinking of seeking assistance, I'd sort of catastrophize: "What if the treadmill ...

Feb 10

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Child Development, Parenting

Written By:
Dr. Angelo Subida, Psychotherapist

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Alienated Parents, Alienated Children

Professionally and personally, my heart goes out to parents and children who have become heartbroken and "alienated" in their relationship. I am grateful to families - both parents and children - who have shared with me their painful experiences in our sessions together. They are just too ...

Aug 19

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Divorce / Divorce Adjustment, Parenting

Written By:
Dr. Angelo Subida, Psychotherapist

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Society and Psychopathology

Let me tell you something that might sound radical to you: we all live in an "addicted society." Society contributes a huge part into the corruption, dysfunction, or breakdown of individuals and families in our world. Would that be so difficult for you to grasp?One time, I was speaking to ...

Jul 14

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Addictions, Spirituality

Written By:
Dr. Angelo Subida, Psychotherapist

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