Many people who are codependent do not value and love themselves, their Self, because they have learned in their family of origin that they were of little value or even worse that they were bad. Fortunately there are ways you can learn to reverse this kind of early negative conditioning.
One way to increase your valuing of your Self is to take time for yourself and in this time take concrete steps of valuing the self. If you are middle aged or older this can often take the form of taking interest in your own personal life history. This is similar to the way some people who love their country will take time to read the history of their country. Your own self deserves you taking time to examine some pleasant aspects of your own life story perhaps from years ago or even from when you were a very young child.
I recently recalled as a child how on Saturday mornings, 60 years ago in Windsor, the old auto capital of Canada, I would listen to a radio program which ...
Categories: Self-Care / Self Compassion, Self-Love
Saturday, May 25, 2013
Scientists at Newcastle University have shed new light on how the brain tunes in to relevant information.
Publishing in Neuron, the team reveal the interplay of brain chemicals which help us pay attention in work funded by the Wellcome Trust and BBSRC. Read more
Saturday, May 25, 2013
Many studies have confirmed the link between childhood sexual abuse and substance-related problems in adulthood. But a new investigation finds that being raped or molested at a young age also makes young girls far more likely to start drinking or doing drugs during their preteen years. Read more
Saturday, May 25, 2013
Researchers from the Bergen fMRI Group at the University of Bergen (UiB) are working on how to help schizophrenics, who hear voices. The way they do this is by studying people who also hear voices, but who do not suffer from a mental illness. For a five-year period, the group is studying the brain processes causing people to hear voices. A recent report published in Frontiers in Human Neuroscience shows some of the group’s startling results. – We have found that the primary auditory cortex of healthy people who hear voices, responds less to outside stimulus than the corresponding area of the brain in people ... Read more
Friday, May 24, 2013
Until now, little was scientifically known about the human potential to cultivate compassion — the emotional state of caring for people who are suffering in a way that motivates altruistic behavior.
A new study by researchers at the Center for Investigating Healthy Minds at the Waisman Center of the University of Wisconsin-Madison shows that adults can be trained to be more compassionate. The report, published ... Read more
Friday, May 24, 2013
In France there's a psychologist, Professor Nicolas Gueguen, who roams the North-West, asking young women for their telephone numbers—or at least his research assistants and experimental confederates do.
This isn't just to boost the national stereotype, but all in the name of science. Read more
Friday, May 24, 2013
A new study provides neurobiological evidence for dysfunction in the neural circuitry underlying emotion regulation in people with insomnia, which may have implications for the risk relationship between insomnia and depression.
“Insomnia has been consistently identified as a risk factor for depression,” said lead author Peter Franzen, PhD, an assistant professor of psychiatry at the University of Pittsburgh School of ... Read more
Thursday, May 23, 2013
Children who are exposed to secondhand smoke in early childhood are more likely to grow up to physically aggressive and antisocial, regardless of whether they were exposed during pregnancy or their parents have a history of being antisocial, according to Linda Pagani and Caroline Fitzpatrick of the University of Montreal and its affiliated CHU Sainte-Justine hospital. No study ... Read more
Thursday, May 23, 2013
In April 15, 2013, Dove launched a 3-minute video entitled “Dove Real Beauty Sketches.” The video achieved instant popularity and has been watched millions of times — a successful viral campaign which has been widely talked about. In the video, a small group of women are asked to describe their faces to a person whom they cannot see. The person is a forensic artist who is there to draw pictures of the women based on their verbal descriptions. A curtain separates the ... Read more
Thursday, May 23, 2013
Workaholics tend to live in extremes, with great job satisfaction and creativity on the one hand and high levels of frustration and exhaustion on the other hand. Now, a new Florida State University study offers managers practical ways to help these employees stay healthy and effective on the job.
Wayne Hochwarter, the Jim Moran Professor of Business Administration in Florida State’s College of Business, and research ... Read more
Wednesday, May 22, 2013
Turns out, that old “practice makes perfect” adage may be overblown.
New research led by Michigan State University’s Zach Hambrick finds that a copious amount of practice is not enough to explain why people differ in level of skill in two widely studied activities, chess and music.
In other words, it takes more than hard work to become an expert. Hambrick, writing in the research journal Intelligence, said natural talent and other factors likely play a role in ... Read more
Wednesday, May 22, 2013
Publication of US psychiatry's updated diagnostic code has provoked renewed debate in recent weeks over the extent to which mental illness ought to be framed as a psychosocial or a biological problem. The answer of course is that it is both. A new Canadian study captures this interplay, showing how close friendships appear to mitigate the risk for girls whose genes mean they are ... Read more
Wednesday, May 22, 2013
As high schoolers prepare for final exams, teens nationwide may be tempted to use a “study drug” — a prescription stimulant or amphetamine — to gain an academic edge. But a new University of Michigan poll shows only one in 100 parents of teens 13-17 years old believes that their teen has used a study drug. Read more
Tuesday, May 21, 2013
Retirement has a detrimental impact on mental and physical health, a new study has found.
The study, published by the Institute of Economic Affairs (IEA), a think tank, found that retirement results in a "drastic decline in health" in the medium and long term.
The IEA said the study suggests people should work for longer for health as well as economic reasons. Read more
Tuesday, May 21, 2013
A new study conducted by researchers at the Child Study Center at NYU Langone Medical Center found men diagnosed as children with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) were twice as likely to be obese in a 33-year follow-up study compared to men who were not diagnosed with the condition. The study appears in the May 20 online edition of Pediatrics. Read more
Tuesday, May 21, 2013
A single short putt is necessary to win the tournament, but suddenly the golfer's hands cramp up, and the putt goes wide. According to several studies, as many as 48 percent of serious golfers have experienced such motor skill failures, known as the yips. It is most often used to describe golf-related errors, although the yips can strike athletes in any sport. Read more
Monday, May 20, 2013
Research shows that the earlier the age at which youth take their first alcoholic drink, the greater the risk of developing alcohol problems. Thus, age at first drink (AFD) is generally considered a powerful predictor of progression to alcohol-related harm. A new study shows that individuals who have their first drink during puberty subsequently have higher drinking levels than ... Read more
Monday, May 20, 2013
A new study in Psychological Science reveals that the benefits of urban green space—and the more of it, the better—extend far beyond the purely ornamental. Increases in green space correspond to increases in happiness, decreases in depression, and a general bump to well-being and life satisfaction. While we may not be happier if we live in California, it seems like we certainly are if we live with access to extensive ... Read more
Monday, May 20, 2013
Can we reduce deaths caused by depression and schizophrenia with early detection? Read more
Saturday, May 18, 2013
We’ve all experienced downward spirals, in which dark emotions lead to destructive behavior that damages our health, strains our relationships, and leaves us feeling even worse than when we started. Wouldn’t it be nice if there was an uplifting equivalent to that destructive chain of events? Read more
Saturday, May 18, 2013
If you’re a left-brain thinker, chances are you use your right hand to hold your cell phone up to your right ear, according to a newly published study from Henry Ford Hospital in Detroit.
The study – to appear online in JAMA Otolaryngology-Head & Neck Surgery – shows a strong correlation between brain dominance and the ear used to listen to a cell phone. More than 70% of ... Read more
Saturday, May 18, 2013
Scientists have examined the effects of language on categorical color perception — the idea that color perception is affected by how it is described in language — with behavioral research. Meanwhile, other scholars have looked into this phenomenon using neuroimaging techniques in an attempt to get a better look at the neural processes underlying these results. Read more
Friday, May 17, 2013
In the future, if you want to improve your ability to manipulate numbers in your head, you might just plug yourself in. So say researchers who report in the Cell Press journal Current Biology on May 16 on studies of a harmless form of brain stimulation applied to an area known to be important for math ability.
"With just five days of cognitive training and noninvasive, painless brain stimulation, we were able to bring about ... Read more
Friday, May 17, 2013
Almost fifteen years ago, in a book called “Chance, Development, and Aging,” the gerontologists Caleb Finch and Thomas Kirkwood described a truly elegant study of biology: a batch of roundworms, all genetically identical, raised on identical diets of agar. Despite having identical genetics and near-identical environments, some worms lived far longer than others. The lesson? The classical equation of “life = nature + nurture” had left out chance. Read more
Friday, May 17, 2013
Whether we’re listening to Bach or the blues, our brains are wired to make music-color connections depending on how the melodies make us feel, according to new research from the University of California, Berkeley. For instance, Mozart’s jaunty Flute Concerto No. 1 in G major is most often associated with bright yellow and orange, whereas his dour Requiem in D minor is more likely to be linked to dark, bluish gray. Read more
Thursday, May 16, 2013
Non-invasive brain stimulation techniques aimed at mental and neurological conditions include transcranial magnetic stimulation (TMS) for depression, and transcranial direct current (electrical) stimulation (tDCS), shown to improve memory. Transcranial ultrasound stimulation (TUS) has also shown promise.
Ultrasound consists of mechanical vibrations, like sound, but with frequencies far greater than the upper limit of human ... Read more
Thursday, May 16, 2013
Say I want my partner to stop cracking his knuckles or get my daughter to put down her mobile phone at meal times or start someone else exercising: how do I do that?
It's not something I cover in the book, which focuses mainly on how habits work, how much of our everyday lives they influence and how to change your own personal habits. Read more
Thursday, May 16, 2013
Consumers believe a product is more effective when images of the product and its desired outcome are placed closer together in advertisements, according to a new study in the Journal of Consumer Research.
“Merely changing the spatial proximity between the image of a product and its desired effect in an advertisement influences judgment of product effectiveness. Consumers tend to judge the product to be more effective when ... Read more
Wednesday, May 15, 2013
Consumers experiencing relationship problems are more likely to prefer
aesthetic experiences that reflect their negative mood, according to a new study in the Journal of Consumer Research.
“Emotional experiences of aesthetic products are important to our happiness and well-being. Music, movies, paintings, or novels that
are compatible with our current mood and feelings, akin to an empathic friend, are more appreciated when ... Read more
Wednesday, May 15, 2013
Sporting events can bring a community together, such as when the Louisville Cardinals won the NCAA championship and University of Louisville campus was filled with camaraderie. They also can fuel bitter rivalries, such as the long-standing animosity between the St. Louis Cardinals and the Chicago Cubs. A new University of Missouri study has found that testosterone levels during ... Read more
Wednesday, May 15, 2013
Estimates of combat-related Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) in U.S. veterans since the Vietnam War ranges from approximately 2& to 17%. Additional studies of combat veterans of more recent wars places the range of Iraq War returnees who suffer from PTSD between 4% and 17%. Currently, there is no one form of treatment that has been found effective in combating this disorder, but can the brain somehow be encouraged to calm itself down? Read more

Mental Toughness
By Michael Sheard
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Willpower: Rediscovering the Greatest Human Strength
By Roy F. Baumeister
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My Voice: Overcoming
By Chua Seng Lee
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Thinking, Fast and Slow
By Daniel Kahneman
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The Psychopath Test
By Jon Ronson
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What is Madness?
By Darian Leader
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Moonwalking with Einstein: The Art and Science of Remembering Everything
By Joshua Foer
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Buddha's Brain: The Practical Neuroscience of Happiness, Love, and Wisdom
By Rick Hanson, Ph.D.
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Handbook of Self and Identity
By Mark R. Leary and June Price Tangney
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The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion
By Christopher K. Germer
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Care of the Soul: a guide for cultivating depth and sacredness in everyday life
By Thomas Moore
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The Confidence Gap: From fear to freedom
By Russ Harris
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The evolution of childhood : relationships, emotion, mind
By Melvin Konner
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Developmental cognitive neuroscience : an introduction
By Mark H Johnson; Michelle De Haan
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Not by chance alone : my life as a social psychologist
By Elliot Aronson
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May 24, 2013
According to The British Association of Art Therapists (BAAT), art therapy is a form of psychotherapy that uses art media as its primary mode of communication. It is practised by qualified, registered Art Therapists who work with children, young people, adults and the elderly. Clients who can use art therapy may have a wide range of difficulties, disabilities or diagnoses. These include, for example emotional, behavioural or mental health problems, learning or physical disabilities, life-limiting conditions, brain-injury or neurological conditions and physical illness.
Categories: Psychology in Asia
May 14, 2013
It’s well known that exercise is an effective treatment for depression, but recent research has enabled psychiatrists to give guidance on precisely how much exercise is enough exercise to give the desired results when treating depression. So how are therapists using exercise in their treatment regimes, and should they be using it more? Are there psychological benefits to exercise as well as biochemical ones, and can exercise help with addiction?
Categories: Happiness
May 13, 2013
The power of art to transform people’s lives is well known. Art has been used as a breakthrough technique to reach a patient’s deepest fears, and their most closely guarded emotions. By representing emotions wordlessly, a barrier is lowered, allowing patients to express things that they cannot bring themselves to say, either due to the pain it would evoke, or because of shame. Visual journals are the latest way for those undergoing addiction or psychiatric treatment to find a route through their pain, and here we look at the way these journals can be used to combat stress.
Categories: Stress Management
May 10, 2013
In 1966, the Beatles wrote about Eleanor Rigby and the lonliness and depression she experienced:
All the lonely people
Where do they all come from?
All the lonely people
Where do they all belong?
Loneliness is something that most of us will feel at times in our lives. Some of us living in the city crave a quiet moment to ...
Categories: Attachment Issues, Bullying, Codependency / Dependency, Depression / Bipolar, Emptiness, Ending a relationship issues, Happiness, Self-Esteem, Social Anxiety / Phobia, Social Isolation
May 2, 2013
The first thing I noticed about Tom was his large frame and piercing eyes. He had come to call me on my mobile phone a few hours ago. And now, we were in a hotel, drinking coffee, and eventually past the pleasantries.He reached for the marrow of his purpose for meeting me. “I need help for managing my wife,” he said. “She cannot agree any longer that she remain my wife while I ...
Categories: Addictions, Attachment Issues, Infidelity
May 1, 2013
Each of us is alone. In our human existence, aloneness is an inevitable fact of life. We entered this world alone. We will exit this world alone.I've discovered in my life and in the life of others that how we embrace our aloneness determines whether it will be toxic or nourishing.Toxic aloneness is produced by internalized shame. Unprocessed "original pain." Old baggage, unfinished ...
Categories: Adjusting to Change / Life Transitions, Adult psychological development
April 29, 2013
There is this man who claims he has no money for therapy. He owns a car and condominium unit, smokes 3 packs of cigarettes a day, and dines out in expensive restaurants. If he sets aside funds even just by stopping smoking, he could afford to pay for his weekly personal therapy.Doctors always remind trauma victims that therapy costs. But not to be in therapy is way much, much more costly ...
Categories: Happiness, Self-Care / Self Compassion
April 27, 2013
Feelings are a crucial part of the inner life. When one is psychologically disturbed or traumatized, feelings become vulnerable. A person may lose touch of the reality of his feelings. He can be alienated from his feelings.Yet these feelings don't go away. They continue to appear or surface. Most commonly, damaged emotions take the form of emptiness, low self-esteem, shame, anger, confusion, ...
Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Emotional Abuse
April 23, 2013
I’m reminded of one of Dr. Sigmund Freud’s psychodynamic concepts, “ego defenses.” Ego defenses are inhibiting internal mechanisms that prevent us from “knowing” early emotional pain through rationalizing, analyzing, explaining away, minimizing, overgeneralization etc.
Often, this early emotional pain is numbed out by the ego defenses. It’s acted ...
Categories: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Intelligence
April 23, 2013
This new century has brought with it the topic of climate change as a constant in the news media. A controversial and complex topic, it involves discerning the potential contributions of solar radiation, continental drift, and greenhouse gas concentrations to the changing levels of vegetation, precipitation and sea ice.
In this article we will discuss a group of volunteers who agreed to be ...
Categories: Obsessions & Compulsions (OCD)
April 22, 2013
Healing can happen only in a climate of openness and truth.This is the tragedy of Mina. Mina was caught in adultery, one which traumatized her husband. Her need to deny or "stonewall" her wrongdoing prevented her personal, marital, and family healing. What's her primary wound? I believe it's not so much the affair as it is her insistence on her own innocence with the resulting ...
Categories: Addictions, Attachment Issues, Couple Counseling
April 20, 2013
Who is a Psychotherapist? You may be unfamiliar with the term or who he or she is. In fact, lots have misconceptions about it.
Two basic words: healer, helper.
A psychotherapist is one who helps people heal and resolve their emotional, mental, behavioral, or relational problems that cause unhappiness or lack of freedom in life.
"Psycho" comes from the Greek root word ...
Categories: Mental Health Professions
April 10, 2013
In Connecticut USA, a few months ago, about 20 children from an elementary school was massacred by a 20-year-old Adam who also killed his mother and himself.You know, I have a daughter - Angel - who is still in the elementary school. I've held her closer and tighter than before after knowing of this news. I began to think of important things I need to say to her while she's still young. ...
Categories: Bereavement
April 7, 2013
Do you know that an average toddler laughs about 200 times each day? And according to researchers of laughter, the toddler registers only 6 laughs a day by the time he reaches average adulthood. Tell me, where did the toddler lose 194 laughs?I have a theory. At least, for my self. I think I start losing them when I begun getting hard spankings at home. I think my laughs began to vanish when I ...
Categories: Adult psychological development