Self-Compassion: Holding Your Self Kindly

He didn't see it coming. Around the last rounds of a singing reality contest on TV, I watched Lito so focused and reality was treating him well. The coaches were picking and advancing him. Then, reality slap came in. He was removed from advancing to the semi-final round.Lito saw me right after ...

Jun 25

Categories: Depression, Grief, Loss, Bereavement, Self-Care / Self Compassion

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Are You A Victim Of A Jerk?

It took a while. But Helen was finally able to let go of her sexually addicted, unfaithful, and abusive boyfriend. To help Helen with her growing depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts, I got her in touch with reality and to see what really is. She finally realized that she was victimized by a ...

Jun 12

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Emotional Abuse, Personality problems

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First Steps In Infidelity Treatment

When I saw Tonton, he was severely hurt, depressed, and breaking down. He was in much tears. He just caught his wife cheating again over the internet and seeing the OP (other person).Along the way, he was able to check reality and acknowledge to himself that his wife remained unrepentant of her ...

Jun 7

Categories: Addictions, Ending a relationship issues, Relationships & Marriage

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Abused, Hurting Parents

Again this afternoon, like in many of my counseling sessions, a hurting Mom cried. She said, "My husband and I have invested much time and money on our son, and he's still violent and in alcoholism and drug addiction." This Mom's energy and hope are progressively being siphoned to ...

May 22

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Parenting, Teenage Issues

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Are You Loving From A Full Or Empty Bucket?

This week, I received a heartbreaking message from a divorced, 32-year-old Middle Eastern woman I'd call Riza. She is currently remarried after a time of promiscuity from the first divorce and left everything to be with her second husband in a foreign country.After just less than a year of ...

May 10

Categories: Divorce / Divorce Adjustment, Love addiction, Self-Esteem

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Forgiveness and Mental Health

There was a time when the field of medicine, psychiatry, or even psychology was uncomfortable with looking too closely at the issue of forgiveness. Forgiveness is often perceived as an issue of faith. But today, forgiveness has become a widely studied topic in the mental health clinical field.In ...

Apr 27

Categories: Forgiveness, Relationships & Marriage, Religious Issues

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Does Short-Term Relief Work?

Short term relief does not last. It can in fact become a separate psychological issue unto itself.When John saw me for help, he has been under psychiatric treatment for over 10 years. Despite the length of his treatment, he remained "stuck" within himself - psychologically, emotionally, ...

Apr 1

Categories: Addictions, Emptiness, Grief, Loss, Bereavement

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Money and Mental Health

Money is neutral but it's a proven drug that can destroy lives.This therapy insight has not come easily for me. I too am exposed to a pervading culture where we are all in. A culture that puts so much stock on the temporary. To find security in money. To fall in love with possessions, the ...

Mar 14

Categories: Addictions, Family Problems, Life Purpose / Meaning / Inner-Guidance

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Men In Therapy

It's clear to me that Robert started therapy because of "external pressure." He was having a severe separation crisis with his wife, Anna, who demanded counseling intervention. Anna disappeared from their home because she couldn't endure her husband's verbal and emotional ...

Mar 8

Categories: Adult psychological development, Men's Issues, Relationships & ...

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Problem Children, Problem Parents

Parenthood in our society is more an idea of how to “raise kids.” There are problem children, but not problem parents. Yet the truth and reality of the matter is, parenthood needs to be more the growth and development of parents.I’m reminded of a sobbing mother who came over ...

Feb 25

Categories: Child and/or Adolescent Issues, Family Problems, Parenting

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Rebuilding After Affair Trauma

Susan has been cheated on by her husband. She is broken. It's so difficult for her to make it through each day. She struggles with finding energy to get out of bed each morning. Physically, she is very listless, trying to hold her self together. Her recurring post-affair memories and thoughts ...

Feb 18

Categories: Addictions, Couple Counseling, Infidelity

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Healing Toxic Anger

Many people have habitual and uncontrollable anger. Their anger is selfish. It's an automatic response to things not going their way. It could involve rage, explosion of temper, shouting, verbal abuse, and physical violence.When I met Lito, he was easily enraged and quick to explode at his wife and children. In various situations, even with ...

Feb 13

Categories: Addictions, Aggression & Violence, Anger Management

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Is Gestalt Therapy Ok?

Gestalt Therapy, one of today's popular psychotherapy approaches, is founded by psychotherapist Dr. Fritz Perls. The following well-known Gestalt prayer written by Dr. Perls in the 1960s captures the spirit of this therapeutic approach:"I do my thing and you do your thing, I am not in this ...

Feb 12

Categories: Addictions, Life Purpose / Meaning / Inner-Guidance, Strengths ...

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The Abandoned Baby

Yesterday, an 8-year-old child, Gabrielle, was brought to me. When she was born, her biological father gave her away to a relative. From birth, her biological mother completely abandoned her and never appeared to her up to this day.A number of weeks ago, when Gabrielle found out that her caretakers ...

Jan 30

Categories: Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues, Child Development, Parenting

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Character and Broken Vows

Nowadays, broken marriage vows have become epidemic with over half of marriages experiencing adultery or divorce. This accounts for increasing numbers of dyfunctional families and traumatized children in our midst in need of help. Broken vows never lead anything good for society.In a counseling ...

Jan 27

Categories: Adult psychological development, Divorce / Divorce Adjustment, ...

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Blog Writer:

Dr. Angelo Subida, Psychotherapist

Dr. Angelo Subida is a clinical psychotherapist, author, and speaker. He is author of books "Inner Healing," "Secrets Of Your Self," "Chess and Life," among others, blogs, and articles. He has appeared frequently as an expert on psychotherapy/life recovery issues on national television, radio broadcasts, print media, and webcasts, including GMA 7, TV 5, ABS CBN 2, Q-11, 700 Club, Radyo Veritas, Inquirer Radio, Smart Parenting Magazine, Business Mirror, among others, and has served as resident therapist/counselor for parents and kid-artists in the highly popular ABS-CBN 2 Voice Kids TV singing reality show. Dr. Subida is an eclectic, multidisciplinary therapist and originator of his own revolutionary high-tech, high-touch counseling plus model. His areas of specialization include parent-child therapy, clinical infidelity treatment, relationship/marital counseling, separation/divorce therapy, anger management, depression, addictions, psychotherapy-spirituality integration, and innovative chess therapy. For more of Dr. Subida, you can find him at www.drsubida.com.

Dr. Angelo Subida, Psychotherapist belongs to Dr. Angelo Subida Psychotherapy Clinic in Philippines