I Don't know who I am unless people tell me who I am.

Published on August 5, 2019

Values

Firstly, what are your core values?  Here are few values that you might want to think about:

  • Authenticity
  • Autonomy
  • Balance
  • Compassion
  • Competency
  • Determination
  • Fairness
  • Growth
  • Honesty
  • Inner Harmony
  • Learning
  • Self-Respect
  • Spirituality
  • Trustworthiness

James Clear provides a great list of common core values if you are unsure.

Boundaries

What are you doing to please others even if it makes you uncomfortable?  Setting boundaries helps you to accomplish goals and be an authentic person.  When you are afraid to say no to others, you might end up leading a life that others want you to live.  This can lead to resentment.

What makes you feel alive?

What energises you?  What drains your energy?  If something is draining your energy, set a boundary.  Focus more on what excites you.

Develop your own style

Buy clothes based on what makes you feel good, not what the trend dictates.

Connect to yourself

When you understand your own beliefs, feelings and needs, you can become more authentic.  Make a list of what you will and will not tolerate.  Part of that list should include not tolerating abuse or control from others.

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If you are feeling lost or confused about your identity, please do seek professional help.  To make an appointment with Dr Borschel call +852 2521 4668 or email m.borschel@mindnlife.com

Photo by ROBIN WORRALL on Unsplash


Category(s):Self-Care / Self Compassion, Self-Confidence, Self-Criticism, Self-Doubt, Self-Esteem

Written by:

Dr Monica Borschel

Dr. Borschel’s attachment-based psychodynamic therapy and guided meditative practices enable her clients to find healing within themselves. In so doing, she can help adults, teens, and children to overcome neglect, emotional, verbal, physical abuse, and child abuse.

Furthermore, as an attachment specialist, she also helps individuals understand relationship patterns which prevent them from developing or maintaining healthy relationships. She uses mindfulness practices and positive psychology to reduce anxiety, insomnia, depression and promote confidence and self-esteem.


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