Get married, settle down, have children, and live the rest of your life with the partner that you truly love – this may seem Hollywood-esque, but in reality, a marital relationship has to go through bumps and bruises of life. To help in dealing with these problems, couples can seek marriage counseling.
A shaky marriage is not the only reason why you need to seek counseling. Here are other signs that you need it:
1. Interest is fading
The first few months of most marriages can feel like it’s the best thing that has ever happened to you. You feel like nothing could ever go wrong. However, as time went by, you feel like you and your partner just don’t click anymore. Before it can damage your marriage, ask help from Psychologists Southern Sydney to prevent it from escalating.
Moreover, it’s vital to assess the signs that you’re gradually losing interest in your relationship. Here are some of them:
- You're not physically excited anymore. Your sexual attraction towards your partner has dwindled or faded.
- You don't enjoy hanging out with your partner. For instance, you'd rather watch a TV show than go on a date with him. Or you could be dragging yourself just to go out with him.
- You don't exert any more efforts. For instance, you don't prioritize their texts or calls, or you don't even bother asking about how their day went.
2. Trust is gone
Trust is when you can rely on your partner. Whether it's a functional or relational trust, a marriage without it can be messy. Functional trust is when you can depend on your partner's commitments and behaviors. Relational trust is when you can share your vulnerabilities, insecurities, or feelings.
Breaking trust doesn’t only happen when your partner cheated or lied, but it can come from emotional cuts that have accumulated. For instance, little things such as using your fears against you or not keeping their promises can build up over time. As a result, you may end up not trusting your partner in anything.
Here are signs your trust may be wavering:
- Constantly looking into their social media accounts. To find out whether they're hiding something from you, you check your partner's posts, tags, comments, likes, shares, and other social media postings.
- Asking confirmations from their friends. When your partner is out, you can't help asking their friends to confirm his whereabouts.
- Getting jealous easily. A little jealousy is natural, but when little things make you jealous, then it may be a sign you don't trust your partner. For instance, when you see an attractive colleague of your partner, you don't allow him to talk to that person.
3. Talks are rare
In a relationship, it’s the small things that could blossom your love for each other. One example of these so-called little things is simply talking to each other.
Here are signs that you have trouble talking or opening up to your partner:
- You don’t ask how his day was. Neglecting of this simple act means you don’t want to engage in any small talks with your partner.
- You don’t ask about his feelings. Knowing how your partner is feeling can lead to a more significant topic. However, when you do avoid knowing their feelings, you’re just shutting down your gateway for a talk.
- You may not need to talk about how your relationship is going daily, but completely not talking about it means you no longer want to know its status.
If you and your partner have stopped talking to each other, something may have happened that caused this. It could be something you have done or something your partner has done. If this is so, don’t be afraid to ask for professional help because communication between you two is very vital and lack of communication could make your relationship toxic.
4. Disagreements are frequent
Having disagreements with your partner is very normal as you navigate through your marriage life. For instance, you may disagree on some house rules, or you have different opinions on how to discipline your children. Healthy couples talk about such issues and compromise when necessary.
However, when disagreements turn into arguments and other aspects of your life are seriously affected, such as your children or performance at work, it’s is a sign that you need to seek professional help. When this situation continues, partners become more distant with each other.
Conclusion
Take a deep breath and think about your marriage. Evaluate yourself carefully as to what you really feel. If you see these signs in your relationship, know that you can save your marriage. All you need to do is seek advice from relationship experts when you can’t solve your problems anymore.
