As a psychotherapist, I've become convinced that more than half of the emotional pains we suffer in life are totally unnecessary. A lot of these unnecessary pains are caused by a wounded sense of self worth. And so often, a wounded self worth is accompanied by constant negative self talks, voices, or chatter in the mind.
In my own life as well as that of countless others, we can be shocked when we listen to how harshly we talk to ourselves. I'll show you something. Would you be willing to be taught, willing to be shown, with what I'm about to submit to you metaphorically? It's a piece of paper. I call it your Certificate of Self Worth.
At play, social interactions, work, home - with family members, friends or strangers - many of us run the "rat race." We run for significance and base our self worth on how others react to the image we project. As a result, we automatically put our Certificate of Self Worth in the pockets of other people. For a lot others, they forever put their Certificate of Self Worth in the pockets of toxic parents or spouses who abused and hurt them and never get past their ancient wounds or deprivations.
The healthy choice is to place your Certificate of Self Worth in your own pocket. And that is possible only when you learn to base your self worth on God's view or perception of you (Psalm 139), and become your own best friend. Base your self worth on what God says about your worth to Him. This is the way to cure negative self talks and voices permeating your thoughts and feelings caused by a damaged sense of self worth engendered by others.
I don't know about you. For me, the "rat race" is over, for I finally realize how insignificant it really is.
Dr. Angelo Subida is a clinical psychotherapist, author, and speaker. He is author of books "Inner Healing," "Secrets Of Your Self," "Chess and Life," among others, blogs, and articles. He has appeared frequently as an expert on psychotherapy/life recovery issues on national television, radio broadcasts, print media, and webcasts, including GMA 7, TV 5, ABS CBN 2, Q-11, 700 Club, Radyo Veritas, Inquirer Radio, Smart Parenting Magazine, Business Mirror, among others, and has served as resident therapist/counselor for parents and kid-artists in the highly popular ABS-CBN 2 Voice Kids TV singing reality show. Dr. Subida is an eclectic, multidisciplinary therapist and originator of his own revolutionary high-tech, high-touch counseling plus model. His areas of specialization include parent-child therapy, clinical infidelity treatment, relationship/marital counseling, separation/divorce therapy, anger management, depression, addictions, psychotherapy-spirituality integration, and innovative chess therapy. For more of Dr. Subida, you can find him at www.drsubida.com.